Love Before This Life
For what more miserable than a miserable being
who commiserates not himself; weeping the death
of Dido for love to Aeneas, but weeping not his own
death for want of love to Thee, O God.
--St Augustine, The Confessions
That is a root thrusting through a wall and growing into a warm knot
The elements from the earth ferment into an aphrodisiac
The two arms that embrace you are broken sharp at your armpits
And two wings develop out of your shoulder blades
Your flight arcs along the sunlit surface of the wind
The glimpse of Aeneas who cloaks in golden and looks into the beyond
Strikes like a lightening, and you are a woman of stone from a stone tower
Eyes and mouth agape, wings rusty, wing-flapping turning into a glide
You nose down at the plaza of his chest and a havoc of dust
Rises to relate his heroic deeds
As night steals into night, the only other is snoring
All the majestic stirrings and risings settled, and you linger in moonlight
No woman working before the loom tonight
The buzz of locusts oozes from the nostrils of a wooden horse
It is the phobia from your maidenhood, and it is this
That drove you away from the man always squat in thought
Later, you revved up along the runway of his sight, took off
And retracting your legs…
…When Aeneas’s sword flashes like a wind above your collarbones
You jerk against the blade and in the nick of time
See the man at the center of a crossing, body transparent
Blood gurgling off his heart as if from your neck
A vast shadow masses behind him into an ever-stretching wall
…He remains a container, self-warming with interlocking pipes
Nov. 24-25 2007
前缘
替狄多为伊尼阿斯的殉情洒泪，而不知
怜悯自己，不知自己缺少奉爱天主之心
而行将死去，还有比我这样可悲的人更加可悲的吗？
——奥古斯丁《忏悔录》
那是捅破了墙的根茎 温柔在摇篮里
地气被凝聚 发酵成催化剂 你的脊背
长出翅膀 你飞翔了
那两只拥抱你的手臂折断在你的腋下
你顺着被阳光照暖的风的弧线
飞翔 瞥见伊尼阿斯的背影
啊 他披着金色 坚毅地盯着远方
你顿时像塔楼中被满月击中的女人
艳唇像眼睛一样惊叹
翅膀僵硬 滑翔式地俯冲
撞击他胸膛的广场 一阵烟尘
回响起他的英雄事迹
入夜后只剩夜与鼾声
一切壮举消停 你徘徊于残月下 不闻机杼声
但闻一匹木马的鼻孔传来蝗虫的嗡嗡
正是这少女时代的恐慌才令你最终
将那沉思的男人舍弃在一道路口
沿着他目光的跑道滑行 起飞 收起双腿
…… ……
当伊尼阿斯那沉稳的剑刃如寒风一般掠过你的锁骨
你绝然逆风转身 在那一霎那的回顾中
那男人依然坐在十字路口的中央 身体透明
心 代替你的颈项 汩汩地涌出热血
一大片阴影在他背后的地平线上聚集 上升 如无限的墙
……而他是一只自暖的容器，内置着交错循环的管道
2007年11月25日
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